How To Get The Most Out Of Therapy

Can you be really “good” at therapy? What are the qualities of the clients who get the most out of sessions? We posed these questions to our team of therapists and discussed what advice we’d give to new and longtime clients.

Choose The Right Therapist. (This Matters More Than You Think)

Therapy works best when there’s a solid fit. Not perfect, but functional. Our practice coordinator Kim’s primary role is to make sure each client is with a good therapist fit. Let her listen and guide you.

When choosing a therapist:

• Trust your instincts after reading profiles or doing a consultation call
• Look for someone who feels relatable, not necessarily someone who checks demographic boxes
• Decide what you want sessions to feel like:
  • More listening and a mellow personality?
  • More structure and direction?
  • Someone who will interrupt, challenge, and redirect?
• We are trained for all ages!

At Loyal Blue, all of our therapists have advanced training in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). That matters because:

• CBT is solution-focused
• It provides tools, not just insight
• It keeps therapy from drifting or stalling
• You should feel like something is happening in most sessions

Ask Questions Early & Often

Our therapists ask, “What have you tried already to solve this issue? What has worked a little, or not at all?” We know that you usually have tried many things before seeking counseling, and want to know about your experience. Successful therapy is a collaboration.

Clients who benefit most:

• Share what hasn’t worked before
• Say what they like and don’t like about therapy
• Speak up when something feels unhelpful or unclear
• Give feedback as sessions progress

At Loyal Blue, we build this into the process:

• Session Feedback Forms in every office
• Age-appropriate evaluation scales
• Outreach from our clinical director after the first month

A good therapist wants feedback. If progress can’t be measured, it can’t be improved.

Perhaps most importantly is a point made by our therapist Emmy. She notes that therapy takes focus and will feel like work. “You will work just as hard as the therapist; there is an effort-fulness to effective sessions,” she says. Pay attention and speak up in session. That means:

• Paying attention to what you’re avoiding
• Saying the thing you almost didn’t say
• Noticing the internal voice that says, “That’s not important”

Those moments can be the most important ones.

Show Up Consistently: Attendance Is Very Important

More than half of all clients leave counseling before their treatment goals are met. We try to prevent this.

What we recommend:

• 6–10 sessions to establish understanding and initial relief
• Around 20 sessions to create real, lasting change
• Weekly sessions for the first 6 weeks, whenever possible

For couples, consistency is even more important. Two lives create a lot of data very quickly—and regular sessions allow momentum instead of damage control.

Our family therapist Eric adds, “Just showing up to therapy says you care about getting what you can out of it. You are building a relationship with an ally for your well-being. That allows you to set aside pressure and expectations and trust that getting to session is a big part of getting better.”

Use A Notebook & Practice What You Learn

This is one of the simplest and most effective ways to level up therapy. We offer notebooks and folders at our offices.

Clients who get the most out of sessions:

• Write things down
• Pause after session to reflect
• Track insights, emotions, and questions
• Practice skills in real life—not just in theory

Use them to:

• Capture takeaways immediately after session
• Track CBT tools and experiments
• Note patterns you want to bring back next time

Homework isn’t busywork. It’s how therapy leaves the room and enters your life. There is no judgement in the therapy room, just ideas that haven’t been tried yet. Change takes repetition. You didn’t develop your struggles overnight. You won’t undo them in one week either.

Our therapist Marcus closes most of his sessions by asking how the time was for his clients. Was it helpful? What were some takeaways? What might be discuss next time? What will you practice this coming week?

Trust The Process (Every Therapist Agrees On This)

10 out of 10 of our therapists agree that this attitude will help you get the most from therapy. Yes, you can find the right therapist, provide regular feedback, show up every week, and practice what you learn. All of these will set you on the path to success. But what happens if you’re not finding resolution to your depression, or still experience anxiety more regularly than you’d like?

You can do everything “right” and still feel frustrated sometimes. That doesn’t mean therapy isn’t working.

Along the way, progress includes:

• Temporary setbacks
• Emotional discomfort
• Slower change than you hoped for

Therapy builds tolerance for:

• Impatience
• Disappointment
• Frustration

These feelings can be signs you’re pushing beyond old patterns.

When things feel stuck:

• Revisit the pillars above
• Look back at your notes
• Notice what’s changed, even subtly
• Expect to step outside your comfort zone

Our trauma specialist Megan tells her clients that their goals are like an “anchor that we return to. We may dip into this and that to learn certain tools in order to get where we want to be, but trust we’ll be back to our goals.” ⚓️